Extra notes about Chapter 18 – The Receiving Half
in the book, The Art of Receiving and Giving: The Wheel of Consent.
Other notes are found here.
Quotes
While I believe my trauma created some fantasies of being rescued, the best kind of help I received was not quite rescue, but rather attention to what I needed.
– Cynthia Orange (in Shock Waves)
The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
Don’t go back to sleep.
You must ask for what you really want.
Don’t go back to sleep.
People are going back and forth across the doorsill
where the two worlds touch.
The door is round and open.
Don’t go back to sleep.
– Rumi
Gifts of the Earth
It’s essential to acknowledge what the land provides, because most people don’t understand it, or they forget. In a scientific sense, there’s merit in identifying and talking about processes like water and air purification. But I do think the phrase ‘ecosystem services’ can lead us to think of the land as a machine for our use. And it’s not the most inspiring word either.
I prefer to ask what gifts the land offers. Gifts require a giver, a being with agency. Gifts invite reciprocity. Gifts help form relationships. Scientists aren’t comfortable with the word gifts, so we get ecosystem services instead. These terms arise from different world views, but both recognize the way the land sustains life.
When we breathe clean air or drink clean water, or when the slopes our houses are built on refuse to erode because of the living roots holding the soil together, we’re receiving gifts. Too often we take for granted the complex natural systems that support us. When I get up in the morning and breathe the sweet air, I try to remember all the beings around me that have worked hard to make this possible. I try to be grateful.
– Robin Wall Kimmerer (in The Sun Magazine)
Entitlement and Privilege
This is a huge topic and I am not an expert. Here are a few people who offer some expertise and wisdom.
Justice in June, a curriculum of watching and reading, more thorough than anything I could have created.
Anti-racism resources, in the steps to take you through a process.
How studying privilege systems can strengthen compassion. (TED talk)
Climbing the White Escalator, about certain government programs that have been available to white folks but not people of color, as a concrete example of having received unearned advantages.
Books
The Deep Yes: the Lost Art of True Receiving by Rosalyn Dischiavo
The Art of Asking: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Let People Help, by Amanda Palmer